Friday, July 29, 2005

i slated to go oversea..

i duno how to explain my feeling now.. confused, sad, do not noe wat to do.. duno wat to tink.. kana this is like no future liao for me.. although many ppl say going oversea is so gd.. so fortunate.. so enriching.. go there can gain more exposure.. but 1 yr lei.. i duno lei.. its abit too long for me.. n erm being me, i tink i cannt survive out there w/o any support frm my family.. although the money is great, i just cannt leave my family.. money will not erase the feeling of home...i will miss alot of things.. my com.. my frens.... ahhhhhhh.. my family will b the most i miss.. my sisters n brothers.. my father n my deceased mother who r there in singapore...........

i duno wat to tink now.. everyday is a timebomb..

can tell me god wat should i do now?
i m serious now..

i really do not know wat to do.......

i helpless..

duno why i tink of leaving this place, i haf to bite my tonguie n force to hold my emotions back..

i reali tink i cant go away..

i reali tink i haf too much feeling too much things in singapore that i cannot let go

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

tuesday..half wk through?

very tired le..

hmm today wenthrough gas training chamber.. we were supposed to go into the chamber wearing suits.. very clownish..haha..

den tear gas keep pumping into the chamber..

then we r suposed to stand in the chamber completely unmasked.. wah super shiok..

when i finali come out.. mucus keep coming out through nose incesstantly..

then eyes keep tearing .. keep crying.. skin gt burning sensations..

wah shiok ah

this is my first experience of tear gas,.. so shiok. i dun wan incite a riot le!!!

i like this day.. a day i conquered my fear n go in like a man..:P army is reali full of experiences...

tuesday!? half wk through?

Sunday, July 24, 2005

sunday concludes this wk

this wk finali over.. although cannt say super xiong.. but at least it is 1 wk of army over... gg to start another 1 soon.. this 1 will end july.. 1 of the longest mth.. ahh another long mth coming soon.. august..

quick i wish it to b over as soon as possible..

today dun reali do alot of things..

no ppl reali to chat with

alway gt the same usuall ppl

sian life..

haiz losing orientation with the world.. i getting sucked into the monotonous cycle of life.. i losing frens... i losing netfrens.. they r going on with their lifes w/o me along..

i still stuck here.. stuck in the gloomy darknes.... unable to extract myself frm it.. the past

actually i wan write yesterday


actually wan write the blog entry yesterday.. but too tired..

duno why i sotired during wkends

mebbe becoz i work too hard during wkdays..lolx..

hmm actualli to conclude saturday.. i had not done anything..

i woke up ard 10.. online ard 10....

play fm05 whole day.. won epl .. sad.. nv win treble..

go online chat.. the usual suspect.. qi, wen, amelia, esther, liwen, yingying

ahh my life go haywire le la

knew a new online fren.. ahh 26 yr old lady:P..muahaha.. see i aiming for more older gals liao..her name ah chim.. janine i tink..

lolx.. a retail supervisor who work in east.. np gal..

quite a inquistive lady.. ask alot of qn.. but ahh i no life la.. ask me oso no use..

lolx.. can tok la.. she a christian..lolx.. pretty .. erm duno..

today sunday morning.. wat happen to me?

how old is me